Dedicated to My Husband Shaun

In a few days I will celebrate being married to this wonderful man.

For 15 Years.

I am amazed sometimes.

One - for how long that sounds, but doesn't feel.

And two - that we've made it.

We have made it when we shouldn't have.

We have made it when at times one, or both, of us has wanted to call it quits. We have made it when the statistics of married restaurant managers say we shouldn't have. We have made it when the statistics of being parents to a child with a disability and staying married say we shouldn't still be. When stress like moving, changing jobs, and economic turmoil says we should have been done, and we're not. When you marry someone after only dating for 2 months, you shouldn't STILL be 15 years later.

But we are.

And NOW, we understand how all those things have strengthened us. How all those things make us who we are. How fighting through all those things have made us fight for this. Because NOW, we get it. NOW we are married. Committed, self-less, loving and strong. We feel great and thrilled to be celebrating this mark. Because this mark is more than 15 years. It marks us making it. Surviving it. Growing from it. And loving it! THIS is married. THIS is worth all we went through. Those eyes and that smile and this love has been worth it all.

We have had many wonderful times along the way, don't get me wrong. I am just being honest. This isn't "Fakebook". Our marriage has gone through a lot, but we worked at it. And now we are enjoying it so much more than we ever have. Because we see each other with new eyes. Eyes that are looking at each other, and not what the world tells us we "should" have, or how it's "supposed to be". We both see each other with loving eyes, that have have seen it all, and still love, without a doubt.

I don't know his take on all this, but I know he loves me. He thinks I am talented and beautiful even - and especially- when I don't. He encourages and supports, and listens to me.

And he is a great dad.

This man - Who encourages me, and our children, and prays over all our lives.

For us to feel loved, cherished and valued.

For us to have opportunities to grow and to be sure of who, and how wonderful, we are.

And for us to experience as much as life has to offer.

This man - Who will always hold the hands of those put in his care.

To guide them, lead them and to look out for them.

Who takes honor in being the person to provide for his family.

Who is proud of who we are.

Who sees the potential in each of us.

This man - who was asked to care for someone none of us expected.

A boy who needed a kind of love that was blind to expectations and conditions.

Whose love is of purity and honor.

A love of respect that recognizes the gift in the blessings of this child.

This man - who either literally or figuratively, carries us all.

Through the rocky times or the calm breezes.

His love - loves.

Happy 15th Anniversary to my dear husband Shaun. Who has blessed my life, and continues to each and every day. Thank you. For respecting me, honoring me and loving me. And for these beautiful children. I don't know what is in store for us next, but I glad we are doing it together.

I love you.

Against the odds... and still going

A Beautiful, overdue, amazing getaway. Every couple deserves one.

Taylors Falls

My Sweetie!

My husband and I celebrated our 13th wedding anniversary on the 31st,

and sometimes I don't know how we have made it this far.

According to today's research and society's standards -

there are a ton (well at least 13) reasons why we shouldn't still be together.

The stats say:

ONE - Out of every 2 marriages ends in divorce.

TWO - We only dated for 2 months before he proposed. I'm sure that is not advised.

THREE - Children can add substantial stress to a marriage - we have 3.

FOUR - Experts say married couple's can keep their marriage strong by dating once a week.

We are lucky to get 4 a year.

(I don't know anyone, with kids, who can still date 4 times a month - power to you if you are!)

FIVE - The average hours of sleep we get a night. Not helping the stress/patience levels.

SIX - Our sixth anniversary was our last "couple's weekend away".

SEVEN - There's the seven-year itch. Come and gone.

EIGHT - Eight of 10 marriages with a child with a disability ends in divorce.

NINE - Moves/relocation can add major stress to a marriage, we have done it 9 times.

TEN - Only 10% of marriages where one spouse is in the restaurant industry makes it.

ELEVEN - The amount of months we were engaged and "living in sin".

TWELVE - The amount of waking hours we see each other...a week.

Not too much opportunity to move beyond just updating each other of life's events.

THIRTEEN - Another major life stress can be job changes, these can be too much for just one person, but our relationship has gone through 13 job changes between the two of us,

and we are not even done yet.

I won't say any of it is easy. Most of the time it is just too much. It really does wear on each of us. We say things we wish we could take back, we get selfish, and we miss opportunities to be loving. And there are many days, and many reasons beyond these, that each one of us has our turn at wanting to just quit. And sometimes, only knowing that we don't want to quit is all we have.

But then there are these other days.

Days that make the hard ones better than bearable. Days that feel like the first kiss, the first time we saw each other, and like we are the only two people in the world that matter. There are moments when he looks at me, or when I hear his voice, and I still get butterflies. There is excitement in my heart when he calls, or when he pulls in the driveway. There are days when he does or says something that takes my breath away and reminds me so vividly as to why I married him, and why I would do it all over again in a heartbeat.

There isn't always flowers or cards, but there is always a net. The one that he holds out to catch me whenever I feel the world caving in, or our world is falling apart. The one that he holds out every time I worry about the kids, another "issue" with Anthony, or just when that "what if..." fear creeps in.

Our "like" for the other can have it's moments, but we do truly love each other. The "world", and even some people in our lives, probably think we shouldn't still be together. But God doesn't let us go. He reminds us, just when we need it, that no matter what, we are meant to be together. Sometimes it's at the last second, but it's always just in time.

Just look at my list again, there is just cause for us to have had enough.

But we are still going, God can make all things possible.

And "just 'cause" we are sticking it out.

I thank God for our recent 2 days together, and my mom who had the kids. We had the time of our lives, did some major healing of each others hearts and just had a blast together!! We went to Taylors Falls, had some great conversations and even some belly laughs.

With our recent life changes, laughs have been missed.

I also thank God for a husband who is an amazing cook!!

Gotta love a guy who can turn your kitchen table into a four star restaurant -

without the waitress always coming to ask how things are just when you take a bite.

I love you honey, I am so glad that after 13 years, and after so much, - we still "fit".